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So I’ve had the last two days off, i booked them as holiday so I’m not Skiving off of work. Yesterday was meant to be Powderfinger at Brixton O2 Academy on one of their last even UK gigs as a band. And today was meant to be recovering from what was meant to be an awesome night. However. Due to Icelandic volcanoes, Powderfinger has now been postponed till’ June. While postponement is better than cancellation I’m still upset that a volcano ruined my plans.

Was looking forward to an afternoon in London, having some luncheon, meeting up with J-Love, having a beer – or something cold as I’m not really drinking anymore. Rocking out to the might of Powderfinger and just spending today chilling out and recovering.

Although none of that happened, yesterday was still a really good day, except when Emma cheated horribly at a game of Boggle on Hasbro Party Night, shaking my thumbsticks to destroy my 500 points and my win i had over here and then she accused me of being a sore loser!

She does make me jealous though and intensely proud. Emma is my inspiration for wanting to go to University in September and hopefully I’ll be focused from day one until the end aiming as high as she is for the grades. I’ve always settled for Mediocre and I need to change that, I’m pretty certain I am capable of far more than Mediocre, at least i hope i am if I’m wanting to get anywhere in life. Fingers crossed please dear readers.

Today’s plan didn’t alter much from what i had in my head, obviously yesterday’s did, had to give up the greyhound journey to the big smog and had to alter what i was going to do in the afternoon/evening. Today the plan stayed the same. I played some Xbox – Grid and Mass Effect to be more precise.

Thoroughly enjoying Grid, i like how its much closer racing than in Forza, or you can at least how you can catch up with the cars in front if you make a mistake a lot easier. Wider variety of event types as well.I’m enjoying it, i like having my own colour schemes and sponsors and a team mate! Very well done. They’re going to make an awesome F12010 game.

Tom broke my heart though, apparently the F1 game comes out the same day as Halo: Reach it’s going to do nothing but play financial havoc! Since Halo3 I’ve got the Limited Edition of each Halo game – except ODST as that didn’t ‘drop’ with an limited version. Excited though about coming games! I’ve got a lot to finished between now and September. Mass Effect, Fable2, Convictions, Grid, Dirt2, get to level 50 on Forza3. Probably finished Oblivion and Fallout 3 as well, although Emma doesn’t like me playing them when she does as she worries I’ll spoil the game for her.

What does my weekend have in store? The same as my weekend generally does, hopefully up til’ early Sunday morning playing some xbox with Tommy. Go round Gran’s on Sunday morning. Come home, play some more xbox. My weekends are so stressful!.. Nah, not really. I could see all my readers sat there getting confused as to how playing the xbox can get stressful!

I’ve recently ‘acquired’ and enjoyed some Black Lab, a band i heard about through the first Spider-Man soundtrack and never gone out of my way to listen too. They’re pretty good, Genre-ised as ‘Alt Rock’, which is good as that’s apparently a genre I’m quite interested in. What I’ve heard so far i really really like. Although when i think about there’s not really any british band out there which fits the same genre, its interesting really. We produce plenty of Indie bands, but not really anything that goes into the Alt/Soft rock category. Correct me if I’m wrong and introduce me to some by all means. I’m open to anything.

And Nathan I haven’t got round to listening to Bob Evans yet, but I’m going to, I’ll stick him onto my iPod over the weekend. I guess he’s going to be good to listen to on my way to work. Cycling in the sun is particularly lovely. Am enjoying it greatly. Could do with a bit more pressure in my back tyre though, it’s giving me a larger contact patch which of course is making me go slower.

Facebook is actually proving its worth at the moment, got in touch with a few people who i used to be really good friends with and for whatever reason I’ve grown apart from, my Buddy Neil from Fareham College and the mighty Leon Pegg from Brune Park. Its amazing how much people change in all this time. And I think Neil put it the best when he said surprisingly over all these years there really isn’t much of merit to discuss. I feel just the same with all these people I’m getting back in contact with. I haven’t achieved anything over the last 9 years since i left senior school. I haven’t gotten anywhere in life. My only accomplishment is Emma and now she’s making me feel embarrassed with how well she’s doing with everything.

It make’s me feel down upon reflecting. Three different college in five years. Mediocre qualifications to show for it because the same mistakes got made everytime. A failed attempt at the RAF. I don’t know. Makes me worry about my future and if I’m constantly going to be caught in jobs that a trained monkey could do if it possessed better communication skills then throwing faeces to show unhappiness.

Oh well, life’s always better with Hindsight I guess. If i had taken my time at every stage when these choices came up, first bout of college, when the university decision came around, proper research into what I really wanted to do. Would i still be heading down this path? Knowing what i know now i would have loved to have done some kind of science. Something to do with racing fuels, or bio fuels. I think i could have been good at Chemistry if i really tried. But would my life have gone down this route? Who knows, maybe the many universe theory does exist and i have gone on to be some hot shot scientist in the field of Chemistry. Although i am pretty caught up on the idea of Fate as well. I guess that’s why I’m more relaxed about life then some.

But that’s an interesting conundrum isn’t it. I still have to put the effort in to get to where I want to go, fate won’t just deliver it. It makes you work for it, but if your having to work for it then clearly fate doesn’t exist at all. Because if fate did exist and you never had to try we as a species wouldn’t get anywhere, i know i wouldn’t. But then again, where have i got?

Perhaps I could pioneer a new Beat Generation and be celebrated for my literally works. I’d love to do a Kerouac and knock out a timeless classic in three weeks on one long continuous bit of paper. But like I’m finding out with this blog (although i seem to be getting a good 60hits whenever i publish something) that not many people read and/or are interested.

Oh well. The future will bring what the future will bring, lets just turn this ship into the wind and travel to where ever it wants to take us.

 

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One response

  1. anon

    If you hadn’t made the mistakes, you wouldn’t be where you are now. That includes the good stuff.

    12/05/2010 at 11:53

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